Words cannot describe how relieved I was a few weeks ago when I got a job. For over a year, I applied to countless jobs hoping to get any of them…I was literally that desperate. It tested my faith. But, as I look back now–never once was I left to fend for myself, never once did I not have money for food, never once was I without God. He provided me only what I needed and in the process built up my faith more than ever before. God really is enough for me because through Him I get all I need.
But knowing that hasn’t stopped my worrying, I mean I’m only human…right? So, my worry of the day was rent. My first rent check is due on the 1st of June and having just started my job, I am/was concerned that I would be short (between now and June 1st I will have two paychecks). My concern is mainly due to the fact that I literally JUST started my new job at a grocery store and won’t have a lot of hours on my first paycheck or so.
After calculating approximately how much my first paycheck will be I did the same for the next one. All together $390. Now, my rent itself is $350–but I also have to take 10% for my tithe. So if I did the math correctly $390 – $350 for rent – my $39 tithe = I am left with $1. Talk about God providing. But here is the kicker, I only have my schedule for the first week of the second paycheck (because I get paid every-other week). So, in that I laugh knowing that God is providing. It’s almost like He is saying to me,
“Duh, Kimberly! I will always provide what you need…maybe not everything you want, but you will have what you need. Stop worrying, you will make enough for rent and have a week of wages to spend. Why do you doubt me…because in case you haven’t heard, I have already conquered the world. The world will never be too much for me and when you find shelter in me, you too will be able to overcome it.”
He sure is funny. But through this little lesson, I have realized (to the point of understanding through my own experience) that I am actually MORE blessed than I know. I don’t own a fancy car (although I just got a brand-new-used car thanks to my loving parents). I have school loans out. I use coupons and love shopping at the Salvation Army (seriously, it’s like my new favorite place to shop in town). But, I have a God that provides. He has given me a supportive family, an opportunity to earn an education, and a healthy and able body. He has never let me struggle…although at times I’ve felt alone, He has always been there and protected me from this world. Even paying rent…or my phone bill…or my loans is a worldly challenge–but by putting my trust and confidence in God, I know that I will never be unable.
It’s a hard lesson to learn and I am lucky that God has taught it to me in a way that I understand best, humor. But that is another thing about God…He knows us better than we know ourselves. He teaches us the way we best understand. He gives us talents that reflect our heart’s desires (which He also gave us). He has a different plan/purpose for each of us. But, He loves us all the same as His children.
I know I say this a lot. But I really mean it this time. God is good.